For too many years I lived in a world threatened by life. I was scared of everything: people, vehicles, air and especially the dark. The dark was always trying to get into my brain and destroy me. Leaving my house was almost an impossibility. I would be gripped by such paranoia and panic that all I could do was shake and scream. I would injure myself so that I could watch my blood flow and prove to my deceptive mind that I was still alive, was still human. For brief periods I would be set free of this hell and allowed into a different world. One in which everything moved incredibly fast. My mind was my enemy rattling off thoughts at such a speed that I thought I would never catch up. My body went fast as well. I had to get as much accomplished as I could before all the fear came back, and inevitably it did. I would be thrown again back into paranoia. When in a depressive swing I tried to sleep all the time, to hide from the world in slumber.

Finally, it got to be too much. I sought an answer. "Why am I not like everyone else, what¹s wrong with me, isn¹t there anything I can do?" To a fifteen year old, fitting in is the most important thing. Whether it is with the geeks or the popular crowd, everyone fits in somewhere. I was in a clique all my own. My peers feared me, I feared myself. I wanted to die. I needed to die. Death was the only way out of this hell my brain had created for me. Thankfully, after many stays in psyche wards and numerous anti-depressants, I was diagnosed Bipolar II with moderate cycling. An answer! I knew what was wrong. I was put on psychotropic drugs.

This is it, right? I¹ll be fine now. No such luck. Yes, I could leave my house more often, yes I didn¹t want to die as badly, but I still swung. I was still depressed, then manic, then depressed, then manic. I still needed to prove to myself that I was alive by hurting myself. I could not work full-time; I could not go to school. On top of the remaining symptoms I now had to deal with side effects form the drugs. I shook constantly; I dreamed that my family and friends were dying. In my sleep I watched them be raped and/or murdered, I went to their funerals and I grieved for them. I started avoiding sleep. Books were my escape. I would read, the book bouncing from the shaking in my limbs, until my body forced me to sleep. I still was not a fully functioning human being. I had had an I.Q. test done when I was fifteen and was in the 98^th percentile, I knew that I could achieve so much more. I couldn¹t reach what was mine.

One day I was introduced to EMPower Plus. Fearing that it was another quack remedy I sought out a bipolar person that was taking the supplements. He was "normal"! I was stunned that someone that had lived the life I was living was now working full-time, going to school and loving life! With much trepidation I started taking EMPower Plus. Within 3 days I experienced a "really good day". There was no fear just joy! I had energy, I felt ALIVE! I was off my chemical medication within six weeks and have never been on it again. That was two and a half years ago. I am now working full-time at a high stress job. I am upgrading my education and looking at going back to school. I am engaged to be married, we own a house, and I am a human being! I am no longer a burden to society; I can support myself physically, financially and emotionally.

Don¹t take this away from me Health Canada! I can¹t go back to a constant nightmare. I have so much now and can achieve so much more. If I no longer have access to EMPower Plus I no longer have a life. I don¹t want taxpayers having to pay for my living when all I would want would be to die. Please, let me live. It¹s just vitamins and minerals, not a threat to society.

Patricia

Calgary, Alberta